Jun 11, 2009
Let me first say to my husband if he is reading this while out on the High Seas, "I'm sorry" and "Thank you for busting your ass working here at home before you left!"...don't think I didn't notice and appreciate it!
My military spouse peeps out there I hope can identify with some of what I am going through right now, and if you can't, well, sorry I am about to bore you to tears with my complaining! Sailor/Farmer left Tuesday for several weeks again. I don't know what I was thinking by planting such a big garden and taking on so many projects! I don't know where I thought I would get the time for it. Once again, deployment is looming near and I seemed to have been in denial about it.Now, looking at the calendar, I realize that he will be home a total of only about 6-8 weeks this summer/fall, mostly in 2 week spurts before he leaves for the real deployment in November. So now that I am faced with enough produce for a family of 50 (no kidding!), I am once again cursing myself for falling for the "denial stage" yet again. My husband had to work on our fence/gates all weekend just to finish them before he left, so the kids didn't get any "dad time" before he left. I even let a bad one slip, it went something like "if you want a home to come back to, you will finish these - TONIGHT"! Yeah, ooops... This is something he is quite used to in the weeks/months leading up to deployment, and then again at his return, and you would think that after all these years & deployments we would be able to deal with this better, but nope! In my defense, at the time I made my comment, he had just finished setting my potato cages on fire so I was a little tweaked already! (Yeah, he did it by accident, more on that fiasco in my next garden update!) Since he left on Tuesday, I have sunk to bad mommy levels not seen around here in awhile...the past 3 days dinner consisted of McDonald's, Pizza Rolls, and tonight - frozen pizza! I had every intention of cooking dinner this evening, but just finished mowing the lawn in heat & humidity and after cleaning up dog puke, Legos, and wet swimsuits from the floor, I am done! I even yelled at one of my kids today before he could get anything out past "Mommy....." Ugh!
See, all is not always perfect in the real world or in blog world! Too many times we only write about the good things, but my aim is to write about what it is like trying to live a "normal" life in a military world...and sometimes 'dem twos don't mix! I owe the inspiration to my "Honest Mommy" post to The Mrs. over at "Trying Our Best"...thanks, and I hope that now some of that is off my chest I can move on to other things, maybe like figuring out when the local Food Bank holds donation days for produce, LOL!